Caring So Much That It Hurts
June 7th, 2009
The last few weeks have been dedicated to producing all of our marketing material for Bloom. We have been busy discussing tag lines and website copy. We’ve designed our logo, mini-business cards, t-shirts and website. There have been both fun moments and there have been very difficult moments. At times I could be running around the room because I was so excited about what we accomplished, but there were other moments when the tension of a decision would produce frustration and tears.
This week we had some of our launch team members over to talk and pray. One asked my wife and I why the process has been so difficult. I teared up as we tried to describe how much pressure there is in producing something on paper that represents a dream so precious and big in your heart. You see, to us there is so much at stake in every detail. We realize the magnitude of the task that we are trying to accomplish. I see the faces of people who have been shunned and not felt comfortable in church, along with the faces of those who are hurting who need help and a loving embrace. With every word we write and every image that we produce, I can not help but overanalyze every aspect of each, wondering if we have expressed the vision correctly. “Will this sentence offend anyone? Does this image represent our love and acceptance? Are we reaching our target market? Will people feel compelled enough to want to visit?” These are questions that constantly run through our minds. My friend Manny is happy that it has been hard. He says that the pain and struggle will help make it beautiful because it will come from the depths of who we are.
I have found something that I care about so much that it hurts. A journey that has been so difficult, but so amazing that I know it can only shape me into a better person. A journey that has caused me to trust God in every step I take. To rely on His grace and peace. Believing that he will provide all creative ideas and resources that we need. To realize that at some point, it is as good as it is going to get, and stop to let God take care of the rest. I have found something that I care about so much that it hurts, but I would not want to have it any other way.
To my wife and daughter, my close friends, and to our entire team, I must say that I am so proud of you and thankful for your help and support in creating this amazing community we are calling Bloom.

Since the inception of this new blog, I have written four posts, just about one a week. But I have to be honest with you; it has been difficult for me to get into a groove. I really enjoy writing and seem to have plenty to say but as of recently, I am at a loss for words. The difficulty for me is seeing the many amazing blogs already out there; so many experts on every subject imaginable. Many say that most blogging subjects are oversaturated and that we don’t need any more. But, I still feel compelled to tell my story; to share my thoughts and feelings through the lens of the personal experiences I have gone through.
I was reading this morning about Jesus eating with many disreputable sinners and how that bothered the religious people of his day. If you read about Jesus in the bible you constantly find him associating and traveling with disreputable sinners. Why did this bother the religious people? Some people have tried so hard to earn a place at the table with Jesus. Somehow in there attempt to live a perfect life they have elevated themselves above their neighbors and friends. Thinking all their hard work has earned them more of the love of God. At the same time these same people try to make others, who don’t live just like them, feel like they are unworthy of God’s love.
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